The Alanis Morissette Thing That Happened

This is the first sketch of "The Alanis Morissette Thing that Happened."  Look at Fred, he's all leaned over in your face "check out this crazy shit!"  It says "Fred is the Shit" on her shirt.  Why Alanis? I kinda liked her because her music was all about her getting jilted from a guy who probably had good reasons and I wanted to spoon her to make her feel good.  Okay, to make me feel good about spooning a chick that felt bad.  For a broken wing girl she was pretty hot.  And the fact that she is sitting with these dude speaks volumes about her desperation. And Peckerhead has no shirt for some reason.  And they're all barefoot. I have no idea why.

The final draft.  She's leaning over because it's hard to sit on a fuckin' beer cooler and look cool.
This is saying a lot more than "Hey, we're having a beer with Alanis Morissette,"  This is a straight-up-jack dis on the music that was escaping from the Studios of Suck in the 90s.  Back in '93, Metallica got chairs, Alanis, hot as she may be, gets no chair.  In the first draft, they knew who she was.  In this one, they have no fucking clue. She may be on MTV, but they have never heard of her.
When we all sat around our televisions at 11:30 PM on a Saturday night and watched our beloved Riki Rachtman sitting there on Headbangers Ball with his fucking hair cut, it was like we were all sucker punched in the gut by our most dearest and best friend the world.
We had known then that the dream was gone; that metal had reached its highest summit of public acceptance and that disgusting shit from Seattle had been allowed to topple it from its lofty perch. GRUNGE!  WTF!  The reason why Kurt Cobain didn't do guitar solos was because the no talent hack couldn't play them.

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